All posts in Humorous

Psuedo Accomplishments

mr_aaahThis post exists for the solo purpose of poking fun at vanlandw.

A few days ago he shared out a game he thought he would like on the iPhone. But, he doesn’t have an iPhone, or iPod Touch so he couldn’t get it.

The game consists of a dude that swings from platform to platform like spider-man. The only control you have in the game is telling the dude when he should let go, which in turn determines whether or not he would live and how many points your timing is worth.

This game could easily be a cheap flash game on one of the cesspools of the internet. And, since vanlandw has been posting the completion of flash games as psuedo accomplishments, I had my brother take a photo of me completing this game so I could post it here.

Mwah.

Big Scary Man

Big Scary Man
Yesterday I hopped in my car on a trip to Jimmy Johns. Unfortunately, I was in such a hurry that I did not not check to see if my seat was wet from the rain storm the night before (I usually leave my windows cracked and forot to roll them up). I did not make it very far before I felt the moisture seaping into my jeans. So I pull over at the first place I could fine, which happened to be a church.
Since it was a Saturday afternoon the parking was all but empty. I shared vacant lot with a single woman unloading something from her van. The amusing thing is that while I was searching through my trunk for a towel (that I found), she jumped into her van and locked the doors abandoning everything she has already unpacked.
Apparently she must have assumed this large man folding a towel was going to acost her in a the parking lock of a church. wtf.
Adding insult to injury, Jimmy Johns was out of “sprouts” until Tuesday. ugh.

Yesterday I hopped in my car on a trip to Jimmy Johns. Unfortunately, I was in such a hurry that I did not not check to see if my seat was wet from the rain storm the night before (I usually leave my windows cracked and forot to roll them up). I did not make it very far before I felt the moisture seaping into my jeans. So I pull over at the first place I could fine, which happened to be a church.

Since it was a Saturday afternoon the parking was all but empty. I shared vacant lot with a single woman unloading something from her van. The amusing thing is that while I was searching through my trunk for a towel (that I found), she jumped into her van and locked the doors abandoning everything she has already unpacked.

Apparently she must have assumed this large man folding a towel was going to accost her in a the parking lock of a church. wtf.

Adding insult to injury, Jimmy Johns was out of “sprouts” until Tuesday. ugh.

Transformers 2 FAQ’s

Earlier today, vanlandw, pass this article along to me:

Bonus! Rob’s Transformers 2 F.A.Q.s!

They do a pretty good job of–in a humorous fashion–cover all the glaring flaws in the new Transformers movie. Allow me to summarize the FAQ’s in the same manor they summarized the film:

Could you sum up the film in one line of its dialogue?
“I am standing directly beneath the enemy’s scrotum.”

UPS is Getting Sloppy

UPS Wrong Address and Time

I have heard of UPS accidentally delivering to the wrong location. But, I think this takes it to a whole new level. Apparently, UPS can now not only deliver it to the wrong place, but it can deliver it to the wrong time. Take that space time!

By my reckoning, the package was delivered roughly 1,334 miles away from where it was supposed to go. And, 541 days, 10 hours, 21 minutes before it was shipped.

NXE Avatar

NXE Avatar

Because I can.